progeny

Just when we thought that we had nipped the invasion in the bud, it turns out that Fred and Wilma had a long-term plan in place - wherein their many many hundreds of offspring would descend on us in the summer of 2008. Luckily, Chip happened to notice a strange sort of brown bump on our front rain gutter, a bump the size of a dime, when he drove into the driveway this afternoon. The bump turned out to be a biomass of teeny tiny spiders. Spiders that may appear cute and tiny NOW - but given a nice few weeks of snacking will become the behemoth skulking creatures we discovered last year in the rosemary. CREATURES THAT ARE PLOTTING TO OVERCOME OUR HOUSE, KILL US IN OUR SLEEP, AND THEN WEAR OUR SKINS LIKE COATS SO THEY CAN INCORPORATE THEMSELVES INTO SOCIETY.

Upon further investigation, much chemical warfare (including a nice MacGuyver'ed FLAME THROWER in the guise of a can of hairspray and a fireplace lighter thingy), Chip eradicated the tiny monsters. He found an additional SIX OTHER NESTS around the outside of the house.

Shudder shudder shudder.

and another reason why I love this man

Looking through the tv channels, notices that Titanic is on TBS and has one hour remaining.
Chip: What do you say we watch people die for an hour?

Also, tell me this: why would they film three different endings to Lost? And then there's this: are they ever going to FEED the baby? If I kept Alice hungry for the HOURS they've been carting that baby around the island, she would have up and MILKED A COW.

my childhood friend is going on a date with bob sagat

Chip walked up to me a while back and asked if I knew my friend Stacie was going on a date with Bob Saget from Full House. WHAT??? According to Chip, she was going to a wedding with him - and she'd written about it on her blog.

It turns out that my husband is a TOTAL SKIMMER (tm Tessie), and Stacie had had a DREAM about going on a date with BOB SAGET. My favorite part of this story is how I didn't really overthink the possibility of Stacie dating the dude... because she lives in LA and these kinds of weird things happen to her all the time.

Stacie and I have been friends forever. And we've done our share of weird stuff (going on mystery dream dates with Bob Sagat notwithstanding):

- We had pretend businesses in my family room. The most notable: A&S Computers, where we sat at little "desks" and made "disks" out of black construction paper (when the huge floppy disks were all the rage). Our favorite thing was to write in white colored pencil on the black paper.

- We had a wedding for our Cabbage Patch dolls in Stacie's backyard. I HAVE PHOTOGRAPHIC PROOF. And we both wore our one-piece plaid jumpers. (I topped my ensemble off with knee socks and sandals.) Our parents attended the gala, and Stacie's longsuffering older sister Heather performed the ceremony.

- We made tapes for each other. It became this thing, where we'd each carry around these little tape recorders and just talk and do random stuff like interview our parents (Stacie: What are you doing right now? Stacie's Mom: Making dinner.) and then exchange our tapes. Have I mentioned that we lived AROUND THE CORNER from each other? And we saw each other every day? We made tapes for each other for YEARS.

- One summer Stacie came with us on our family vacation to my grandparents' farm in Idaho. Some of my best vacation memories EVER stem from this trip, including this exchange between me, Stacie, and The Little Brother sitting in the back of my dad's Acura:
Little Brother: SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!!!
Whimsy: NO!!! NO!!! NO!!!
Stacie: WHAT DID YOU HIT ME FOR?!?!
Little Brother: YOU'RE CLOSER!!! I CAN'T REACH HER!!!


Good times. Tomorrow is Stacie's birthday. I've known her forever. Love her to pieces. Can't wait until she visits in early June.

Happy Birthday, Stacie-Racie. I love you.

home again home again

There's this thing that's happening that I'm not ready to talk about. How's that for keeping you in the dark? I hate it when something takes over all my brain space and the thing that I'm thinking about the most is the thing I don't (or can't) talk about. And I hate even more when a blogger is all la la la I'm going to talk about this thing I can't talk about. Which is exactly what I'm doing here. Let's put that to rest, okay?

In other news...

A glimpse into my husband's sense of humor. I was sitting on the couch with the TV on (had been watching Darjeeling Limited, but instead kept the movie running while I typed on my computer). The movie ended and Chip came by, stopped the movie and flipped channels. I didn't pay a single bit of attention to what he was doing and kept typing. Chip came by again about 10 minutes later and said, "Interesting TV choice." I looked up. It was the Golden Girls. For a minute, I defended my show choice and that's when I realized DUDE YOU WERE THE ONE TO PUT THIS ON. He's a weird guy.

ready for close up

I am amazed at how small the world has become.