Friday, December 30, 2011

I'll do my thing and you watch your football

...directly quoting myself from just a few minutes ago.

'Tis the season for much football watching and football discussing and much much much reviewing plays with the DVR and much much much much much attempting to get me interested in the football on the screen.  I resist, naturally. 

One of my favorite football discussions in our house goes like this----
Whimsy: When is that going to be over?
Chip:  There's only ____ minutes (insert number here, could be anything like 9 minutes or 2 minutes or 27 minutes, etc) left in the ____ (quarter, half, game, etc).
Whimsy:  Which means that this will be on for another ____ minutes (wherein Whimsy does a quick calculation and multiplies whatever number Chip gives her by FIVE to account for the many inexplicable delays in this even more inexplicable game).

I sound awfully cranky about it, don't I?  I'm not really that cranky.  It's just the post-Christmas doldrums magnified by Intense Pregnancy Crazy, which is not a pleasant situation.  I also counted approximately how many Saturdays we have left before this baby makes his entrance into our world and HOO BOY if I had not already been feeling the nesting insanity then I am surely in the throws of it now.

You know the most shameful Nesting Crazy Thing I forced Chip to do last time around?  (this deserves all caps, as you'll see) I ACTUALLY MADE THAT POOR MAN CLEAN THE EDGES OF ALL THE BASEBOARDS WITH TURPENTINE...WITH (wait for it.....) A Q-TIP.  True story.  When I recalled that tidbit a couple of weeks ago, I laughed until I CRIED.  And then I gulped and realized that, at the time, it seemed a very reasonable suggestion (demand) to make in order to clean up any paint or glue splotches left over from installing our hardwood floor.  Which means that I am RIPE for some homebrewed CA-RAZY soon.

Stay tuned, I'll see what I can do about seeing through the fog and telling you all about it.

For now, I'm frantically cleaning out closets and inventing new projects for myself that have nothing to do with cleaning.  Nice.

Oh, and also: I'm working on a photo for you guys, but a photo requires me to pose in front of a camera and I haven't been doing a lot of that lately.  The closest I've come to that is when Alice put every hat she could find on my head, finished off with some fabric bags, called me a birthday cake and then asked me to take a picture of her creation.

For those of you who have been pregnant, what was the craziest thing you did in the throws of THE NESTING?

...Let me also add that today is my mother's birthday, and although this post has NOTHING to do with her or her birthday, I'd like to wish her a very happy one.  Filled with lots of cake and ice cream and time to do whatever she wants.  I would not recommend cleaning out closets, mom, more along the lines of naps and such.  Happy birthday, I love you.  I'm nuts and you should be very glad that you're not here with me right now.


KAY said...

Nesting Nuttiness with Kid 1:
Became possessed with cleaning a shower; my mother-in-law started talking in a "talk to the crazy person like their sane" voice because i think she thought the cleaning chemicals were going to affect the baby.

With Kid 2:
We had a gravel garden path and i spent hours fervently picking little weeds out in JANUARY.

Sadly, I have not cared about either of these tasks since the kids were born...

Alicia said...

You sound a wee bit nutty, Whimsy.

I must say that I am always reminded with stories like this that I am so glad my husband likes football as much as I do, which is to say not at all.

I don't think I ever really did any nesting... I mean, not more than my normal spurts of cleaning/organizing. I do remember staying on my feet about six hours once when I was a few days away from induction with Anneke making that eggplant parm recipe from that restaurant that claims it sends women into labor. It didn't, but it was tasty.

Alicia said...

Oh, and if you want to try it in April, I should say that it's not that the recipe REQUIRED six hours... It's just that I don't cook, you know, so trying to figure that stuff out is like some kind of Rubik's puzzle to me. I think it might take a cooking person an hour or two to prep.

Amanda said...

We have that exact same football conversation weekly. Then I start commenting on their "costumes" and why is the ______ set up like ____________? Why does that dude have hair that long? Can they pull his hair while they're taking him down? I can't see his name through all that hair. And then I switch into why can't they just spend all this money that is spent on football and cure cancer and then I am excused from the room until said game is over. It's almost fun for me now.

I don't remember nesting. My first was early and so there was no nesting. In fact, there was 9 loads of laundry for my MIL and SIL to do for me while I was in the hospital ;-) The second child I nested myself a hole right into the couch that was the shape of my giant butt. :(

I will share some crazy with you though. Once, when I was in the throws of food-must-be-in-my-mouth-or-I-will vomit-and-then-cut-a-bitch "morning sickness" the husband and I got stuck in some rather unfortunate traffic on the I5 in an area where you could not exit. When we were finally able to exit the freeway, there was a McDonalds which solved the problem of having to pee, obv, and FOOD. I ate my 5 nuggets and made the mistake of looking away for a moment when the husband ATE MY LAST NUGGET. It's been 11 years and if I say "CHICKEN NUGGET" that man jumps like he's about to get knifed.

tearese said...

with my first I'd go around picking up tiny strings and pieces of dirt off the carpet before we'd go to bed at night. I'd go crazy if I tried to do that now, with how much little stuff my kids can drag into the carpet in one evening.