Tuesday, December 2, 2008

more confessions

I killed my goldfish when I was eight by putting Yardley of London Soft Soap (lavender scent) into his fishbowl...while he was still in it. I thought he wanted to take a bubble bath.



Totally dead to any sort of new toys with Christmas on the horizon, in the past little while I've given Alice the following "toys": measuring cups (1/4 cup and 1/2 cup, if you must know), an egg separator, a Goofy mint tin that's been taped shut (with some of the Goofy cinnamints still helpfully trapped inside - they make a very satisfying clank clank as they are slowly being shaken into powdery oblivion by my daughter), a hot pad that previously belonged to the cats (What? It has a chicken on it! Fergus is in love with the chicken! He chases it all around the house!), and two golf balls (most recent additions). I know, am mother of the YEAR.



I don't know a single thing about operating systems, nor do I care to know anything about operating systems. And yet, yesterday I had a dream in the wee hours of the morning about Windows Vista. At the time, it was a hilarious madcap dream (full of the hijinks and craziness you can expect from Microsoft, no doubt) about people trying to slip Vista into computers without their owners being aware....... if possible, it actually makes even less sense now as I write this.



I ordered something from Target online yesterday and the estimated delivery date is... (wait for it)... JANUARY 5. Hello? That's not until next year.



Okay, that last one isn't a confession, but can you believe that madness? Next YEAR. Now it's your turn. Give me some confessions, internets.



9 comments:

Pickles and Dimes said...

Confession: I am apparently getting this large cold sore (I never get cold sores). It is so large I can actually feel it growing. Gah.

Eleanor Q. said...

I've been getting a lot of mileage out the egg seperator as well, particularly during mealtimes. Also, my cake tupperware is an excellent drum and red tissue paper is hysterical. Who knew?

tearese said...

That Windows Vista dream sounds so...full of hijinks. Ha.
Confession: A neighbor brought their under-one-year-old daughter over this morning last minute so we could watch her while she took the other kid to preschool.
I had to run and get a robe before I answered the door, because I wasn't dressed. It was nine o'clock.
What?

Cherish said...

im still not dressed and its almost 3pm.

i killed a bunny when i was three by putting it in a pool for a bath

Amy said...

what's with killing stuff? my friend had 2 dead goldfish and we thought it'd be fun to cut the tails off. turns out 2nd fish wasn't dead until i cut it's tail off. Yeesh.

Shelly Overlook said...

I'm going to blog about this soon, but my confession is that I do not like Starbucks. I feel like such an outsider, but yuk, I cannot stand that place.

The Importance of being Allen said...

Confession: I listen to Back Street Boys with my daughter and I really like them!!!!

BTW - kitchen utensils are wonderful babysitters. I used to sit R in the kitchen sink and give him wooden spoons while I made dinner. Of course, as he got older, I would get squirted with the sprayer attachment on the sink but he couldn't figure out how to do it all the time so I quickly decided that he would be better suited on the floor getting into pots and pans with my measuring spoons. :)

Kristi said...

I had to do emergency care on a beta fish once because my daughter decided to pour oatmeal in his bowl. He survived!

ETA is January 5th...that's crazy...where did the year go?

Heidi W. said...

Confession:My sister and I have burping contests with our kids! I know it gross but I can confidently say my child always wins!