Out the door, on the way to church to decorate for the Christmas breakfast
Wearing cute mary jane Crocs. A little bit slippery in the garage. Perhaps they aren't the right footwear for winter, but there isn't a lot of time to change.
In the kitchen at the church, unloading the car to decorate for the Christmas breakfast
Have taken a royal spill on the slippery kitchen floor: hit head on refridgerator and banged up foot on a rolling kitchen cart. The Crocs were a bad idea.
Coming in from the garage, after decorating the church for the Christmas breakfast
Another tumble on the garage floor, nearly doing the splits: have banged up and bloodied knee. Conclusion: clearly not winter shoes.
Putting Bean to bed
She appears to be sniffling a lot - maybe she's gotten the cold I've been wrestling.
Settling Bean back to bed
Hmmm she's not breathing very well. I'm thinking she has the cold I've been wrestling.
Settling Bean back to bed. Again.
There is snot. A lot of snot. She definitely has the cold I've been wrestling.
Picking a crying Bean up out of her crib and waking Chip to get the humidifier
No question: it's the cold.
Putting a restless Bean back into her crib as Chip lugs the humidifier into Bean's room
Whimsy (whispers): Did you fill it up with the right amount of water?
Chip (whispers back): Yes. (Puts humidifier on floor and plugs it into the nearby power strip)
Whimsy (whispers): Did you plug it in?
Chip (louder whisper): Yes.
Whimsy (louder whisper): I don't see a light! There's supposed to be some kind of light! Did you read the directions?
Chip (louder whisper): OF COURSE I READ THE DIRECTIONS.
Whimsy (even louder whisper): THEN WHERE'S THE LIGHT?
Chip (shrugs, leaves room)
Whimsy (scratches head, stares at humidifier, fusses with it because she notices that it is not emitting any steam)
Whimsy continues to fuss with the humidifier (quietly) and then walks into master bedroom to find Chip
Whimsy (not whispering): It would help if the power strip was ON.
Loud cry from Bean, Whimsy and Chip go into her room to find her still struggling to breathe, the humidifier is (STILL) not working
Whimsy (no whisper in sight): Why don't you hold Alice and I'll figure this stupid thing out.
Chip (grabs Alice): Sounds good.
Humidifier: (obstinant silence) At least my light is on, dudes.
Whimsy reads the instructions and figures out the problem
Whimsy (to Chip): Um, it needed more water. And salt.
Chip: Salt? Really?
Whimsy: Yes, salt. And that eucalyptus stuff we add to the water.
Humidifier: (gurgles happily)
Alice is still crying. Now in the master bedroom where we are trying to have her sleep with us.
Whimsy: Maybe we need to use the bogey sucker.
Chip: Good idea. I'll hold baby, you do the sucking.
Whimsy: Ha ha. (grabs bogey sucker)
Alice: ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WITH THE BLUE CONTRAPTION OF DEATH? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Bogey sucker: Suck suck suck
Chip: She has quite a set of pipes on her, this one.
Whimsy: You're telling me.
Alice's pipes: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Master bedroom, Chip has left the room to get a glass of water
Whimsy, to Alice: Maybe you just need to be in my arms. Every time we put you down, you cry. Let's just lay here on the bed on my pillow with you in my arms. How's that?
Alice: Wahh! Huh? Hmmm. Okay, maybe this is alright.
Whimsy's neck: What are you doing to me, woman?
Master bedroom, Chip walks back into room to find Alice asleep in Whimsy's arms
Whimsy: (WIDE AWAKE)
Friday, 1:50am, 2:20am, 2:40am, 3:00am, 3:15am, 4:00am, 4:10am, 4:15am, 5:00am
Alice: (wimper, move, turn, snort, wimper, struggle)
Whimsy: (WIDE AWAKE)
Whimsy's phone which is moonlighting as an alarm clock: VIBRATE VIBRATE VIBRATE
Whimsy: Oh dude. We have to get up for the Christmas breakfast.