Friday, September 4, 2009

itty bitty pity party






We're currently in Eugene, Oregon.
We were in Portland for a couple of days, and here for a day (got in yesterday afternoon), then this morning-ish we'll trek down to San Francisco. I realized when I posted on Monday that I made it sound that I'd be vacationing from the blog for a week. But no. I'm here. On my computer. Giving you the most terrifying details of my life.


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This is how well my husband knows me. His gift to me from a recent business trip was an itty bitty bottle of dish soap (he stayed at a Homewood Suites, in which there is a full kitchen in every room - and what do you need in a hotel room with a full kitchen? Why, the tiniest bottle of dish soap to wash your tiny dishes). I love love LOVE tiny bottles. Actually, it is one of my most fervent dreams to have correct, miniature bottles for all of our traveling stuff. A miniature bottle of Burt's Bee's soap for Alice's bath. An itty-bitty tub of Aquaphor for her evening rub-down. Teeny bottles of Aveda smooth hair syrum, a bitsy container of Dreft (always keep a few capfuls around for emergency clothes washing), etc. I know that I can take the tiny containers that I already have and reuse them, reuse them for other purposes --- but that's my own dear hang up: I don't want to use the wrong bottle. I want minis of the CORRECT items so they are all easily identified. Currently my extra travel shots of Dreft are housed in a sample-size Downey bottle. It's cute and tiny and the requisite squee-induced BITSY, but... it's NOT A DREFT CONTAINER. So I'm left feeling very dissatisfied. In my spare dreamland moments I like to imagine that somewhere, someone is making a mini Dreft and all the others, and SOMEDAY I will have the entire miniaturized version of Whimsy's Travel Kit. (I know they made the mini Burt's Bees because I've seen it in that highway-robbery priced "travel kit" for $11 --- and my craziness has actually lead me to CONTEMPLATE shelling over the $11 just so I'd have the right soap bottle but usually common sense does take over and I put the stupid thing BACK ON THE SHELF, where it clearly belongs. I don't need ANY OF THE OTHER STUFF, just the baby shampoo.)


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I've noticed something NEWISHLY weird about myself: I've taken to screwing my eyes tightly shut whenever I'm anticipating something terrible. Case in point: emptying those awful bowls of pent-up refrigerator nastiness a few weeks ago. I pulled the first bowl out of the fridge and was about to dump it in the sink when, quite suddenly, SCENE VANISHES. Why does it vanish? Oh, BECAUSE MY EYES WERE SUDDENLY SHUT. This is the kind of UNuseful quirk that will lead to trouble: Alice is about to fall - and even as I'm reaching out for her, I've got my eyes shut; Chip has me on the front lines to vanquish a behemoth house spider in the kitchen - he's going to lift the mug that is barely covering the spider (who is totally squishing his legs up under him because otherwise they would have been amputated he was SO HUGE)--- so Chip, he goes to lift the mug and I find myself PARALYSED OF MOVEMENT BECAUSE I CAN'T SEE. I've got to stop doing it - and I don't know how it even STARTED, or WHEN.


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I love holding Chip's hands - LOVE IT. And I love it when he's gently stroking my hand or rubbing it or whatever, but every once in a while he'll just suddenly (and accidentally) start to rub the tips of my fingers, down on the nail, in the upward direction --- like from tip-of-nail to cuticle and it FREAKS ME OUT. Especially the cuticle part. It feels like my whole cuticle is getting pushed UP and OFF THE NAIL and it is bad enough to have me ripping my hand from his grasp and then repeatedly shaking my hand while shrieking ACK! TERRIBLE! AWFUL! STOP!


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I have decided that there is some kind of grassroots Nutella freedomlovefest going on right now, and Chip and I are firmly in the cross hairs of their marketing machine because in the last few days we've been privy to way too many Nutella Converts. To wit: our gallon of milk had a Nutella coupon stuck on it and Chip was really ribbing me about going and picking up a jar of the stuff because he knows that the thought of a mystery nut spread gives me the heeby-jeebies. Then it was my own sister saying on Facebook just how much she LOVES The Nutella. Then it was a dude we know from church - a dude completely unrelated to my sister and in no way are they friends in the least bit, especially since she lives in California and our church friend lives in Washington; so then HE mentions his favorite Nutella concoction on Facebook (Nutella on white bread wrapped around a banana). The last straw was Swistle's post about The Nutella, especially when she says that it tastes like a DONUT. I think that's the kind of rousing vote of confidence that I can believe in. (Swistle, you had me at donut!) When we get home, we'll be purchasing a jar of Nutella to see if we've been missing out on one of life's great pleasures. I'm sure the Nutella Marketing Machine will be so proud. As will Swistle.



11 comments:

Amanda said...

I cannot bring myself to try a nutty chocolately mystery spread but everyone I know thinks its the BEST. I've heard that the best way to eat it is on your finger straight from the jar.

Pickles and Dimes said...

I love itty bitty bottles of stuff. Target had tiny bottles of ketchup in their $1 aisle and I had to restrain myself from buying 10 of them. I don't even know what I would DO with them, but they're so cute! (Oh crap, we could use them for camping - dammit!)

I finally had Nutella for the first time a few months ago. It was...OK. I guess I was under the impression everyone loved it because it was good for you, but no. It has just as much junk as anything else that tastes good, like peanut butter or real chocolate.

Anonymous said...

I love tiny bottles, too. One of my favorites is the Aquaphor.

Haven't done Nutella b/c I'm not a huge fan of chocolate or peanut butter (though I do like peanut butter cups, go figure). The thought of it sort of grosses me out.

Happy long weekend!

Alicia said...

I totally get the fascination with the mini and appropriate bottles. I always want to buy the Burt's Bees baby kit, but I know I wouldn't actually USE the stuff. Have you tried the apricot oil? Love that stuff. I still have most of the little bottle we used with our first baby 8 years ago, though, so I clearly don't need more.

I tried Nutella for the first time 12 years or so ago, in college. LOVE it. If I remember correctly, the list of ingredients is pretty short, which I appreciate: hazelnuts, cocoa powder, something sweet. Have you seen the commercials recently that try to bill it almost as a health food? So strange.

wandering nana said...

I love mini things too, especially bottles. I have even shelled out the additional $1.85 (on top of the ridiculous price of the contents) deposit just to have the miniature milk bottle from Golden Glen Creamery that had a pink lid (I now have 3). I also did the same for a cream bottle from Pike Place Market Creamery (did you know about this place?) As far as travel bottles.... Print out the labels.... go to Storeables... buy the cute small jars and glue the labels on them. I know it's not the same but it will help you until you can find the guys that make the little hamburgers from little cows (does anyone else find this a little bit weird, and offending in some way) and maybe hire them to do the little bottles of the things you use...okay, I'm rambling...sorry.(will tell you later about the Mr.s feeling about cutting nails.

Sara Hammond said...

I was introduced to Nutella when I went to Germany a few years ago. Very yummy, not a very strong 'nutty' flavor. It always strikes me as frosting that isn't too sweet, but just right.

Somebody said they didn't think they would like it since they didn't like peanut butter. I haven't eaten peanut butter willingly since I was 5, and I love Nutella, so don't let your feelings about peanut butter stop you from trying it.

And I am so glad I went over to check Swistle's blog - one of her comments said you can get it at Costco. How have I missed that?

M said...

Dude.

I HAVE a tiny bottle of Bert's baby shampoo that my sister in Utah gave me. I shall send it along directly. It may have half a bottle of bert's baby shampoo left in it, but we are Aveeno people here so the bert's is just sitting in a drawer. I shall also commence hunting for tiny dreft.

And I really do love Nutella. On warm toast there is NOTHING yummier. And I have won the Boy over to this phenomenon. Chris likes his on toasted banana bread.

mmmmm. Nutella.

Swistle said...

*dabs tears of pride*

I agree, they have to be the ACTUAL MINIATURES, they can't be stuff poured into other miniatures' empty bottles.

I DO THE EYE-SQUEEZING THING TOO! Example: when the pear hit me in the face yesterday. I didn't see it do it, because I CLOSED MY EYES as soon as the pear began its whistling descent. Also, sometimes a child will throw something at my face, and instead of doing something useful, such as BLOCKING MY FACE WITH MY HANDS, I close my eyes. SMRT.

angelalois said...

ITA re: the Nutells grassroots campaign. I've been feeling the pressure, too!

Also: now I know what to get your for Christmas. On a mission... teeny Dreft bottle, if you exist I will find you!

Spadoman said...

Make labels for your itsy bitsy bottles. Labels that loom like the stuff you love. Labels that will make you love them.
Use adhesive labels and stick them on. Decorate them, make them look lovely and say the product name as you would say it.

So, what kind of peanut butter do you use? Got a favorite? Got one you just won't eat?

Peace. (although I don't know how you'll ever find peace with that itsy bitsy bottle situation.)

wandering nana said...

Sooo.... my book is in..... on my list of things to pick up today and start reading.