Monday, November 26, 2007

letter from the bean

Hello Internet Friends,

My mom appears to be ridiculously involved with Workplace after a 4-day weekend, so she has handed the responsibility of updating The Creamery to me, The Bean, her 25-week-old fetus. Don't ask me how this is possible, as I have neither the motor nor cognitive skills to write a blog post - I am also, of course, currently residing safely in her belly. However, if you'll suspend disbelief for a bit and just revel in the miracle, I'll give you my review of the weekend.

I can't speak for mama or dad specifically, but I can tell you that I personally quite enjoyed this thing they call Thanksgiving Dinner, complete with turkey, mashed potatoes, asparagus, stuffing, and corn. (Mom informed me that I was missing an important tradition called Green Stuff, which is some kind of iced grapefruit/pineapple concoction, floating in 7Up - ah well, better luck next year.) I was also pleased with the dessert portion of the evening: pumpkin pie - something I sampled a couple of weeks ago, and have been prodding mom to eat ever since.

I did my best to keep mom up for most of the night by dancing on her bladder. Worked like a charm, and it ensured me many rocking moments as she lumbered up and off my grandparents' futon and into the bathroom.

Friday morning my parents left for what they told me was the Washington State Coast - but will always be known to me as The Time Mom and I got into a Bladder Control War. She insisted that we stay in the car for heinously long periods of time, and I - padding helpfully on her bladder - I tried my best to get her to get up and move around. My favorite triumph, though scaring the daylights out of mom - was when she was forced to talk dad into stopping at the Crescent Lake Ranger Station to use the facilities. A markedly UNSANITARY facility. Mom was a champ, however, and used many of the Ninja Cleanliness Anti-Germ Commando Moves that dad has shared with her. We got out of there unscathed, though afterwards she insisted on dipping the bottoms of her shoes in Purell.

The rest of the weekend passed by in relative comfort for yours truly. Mom fed me lots of good food, Dad took lots of pictures of both of us, and I received many lovely pats and kind words from both of them.

Enjoy the pictures, dudes. I'll be seeing you all in a few months.

-The Bean


The Wife said...

DUDE!!! You're pregnant!!!

I mean. I knew. I've known since you peed on the stick, but STILL!!! There are PICTURES!!! And you're PREGNANT in THEM!!!

WOW. Am floored.

ailene said...

Awww... cute!!!

stacie d said...

i had the same exact reaction as the wife!! you're pregnant! there's something about seeing it in a picture (in a non look-at-my-belly shot) that makes it so much more real to me! YAY! and i knew miss frijolita had some good things to say from the woom.

emilyshaw said...

welcome to the blogosphere, Bean! It's good to hear from you!
ps - knowing that it's impossible for the Bean to ACTUALLY be typing and also knowing that you are DARLING and a fantastic writer i have to say that you are even MORE darling to type this from Bean's point of view!! what part of the coast did you go see??

Whimsy said...

Thanks for the lovely comments. YES, AM PREGNANT. FEELING LIKE A WALRUS THESE DAYS. But also: so fun!!!!

We went to Ocean Shores on the Washgington Coast. OS can be a little more touristy than farther north, where we've visited previously, but we booked a little later than we planned, and Ocean Shores had much more availability. It was beautiful, and I'm so thankful to live in this amazing place!

condiefamily said...

Beautiful scenery. Beautiful you!

Swistle said...

Dear Bean,
You are too little to be blogging. Go to your room and think about what you did.
Love, Swistle